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BHB5: Lighten Up, It’s 2020 – Accepting Life & Myself

BHB5: Lighten Up, It’s 2020 – Accepting Life & Myself

So it’s been a few weeks since my last blog.  I’ve unintentionally been on a bit of a social media / mental break, and down deep, I really felt like I needed some much needed down time.  Last year was an intense year of change and even though it was amazing, it does come at a cost.  The start of the New Year has been about managing new routines and exploring new opportunities.  Let’s face it, routines are fantastic but what happens when forces outside your control affect them?  Honestly, this is an actual question.  Why, this is my truth at this moment in time.  This blog is more of journal entry then a blog.  If you’ve read my previous blogs you are fully aware that for many months, 5:00-6:00 am was quiet, dark and more importantly, my time.

Adopting healthy routines is amazing, but what happens when others want to do the same?  Over the past couple months Ang has been getting up at the same time to head out to cross training and spin classes.  This is a great thing, and I 100% support her, but it’s also a change.  Change is great, but unfortunately I’m not necessarily the quickest to adapt.  My 5 year old had also decided that sleeping in past 5:30 am is not going to happen. He’s been getting up shortly after 5:00am most days, as a result, on my early morning workout days, I have found myself not getting out the door and trying to fit in a work out later in the day.  A goal that doesn’t necessarily work out all the time; no pun intended.

So this blog is more of a “work through things” rant.  The fact is, these are first world problems and shouldn’t be an issue right?  These are the real life compromises of working parents.  We both have demanding careers, run a business, coach basketball and I have also decided to go back to my roots, and am teaching two courses at a local college this semester.  Once again these are all great opportunities, but they do take time and energy away from other areas of my life.  Where my problem lies is simply I always feel like I am “failing” in the areas that aren’t getting the attention they once did.  I would guess to say that I’m not the only one who feels like they should be able to do it all.

When I was dialed in to my previous morning routine, I got up at 5:00am, journaled, listened to a podcast, worked out, got the kids lunches packed etc….  I felt like I was crushing it.  That was great for me and that particular time in our lives, but what was happening at home?  My kids were still getting up early, and Ang was left managing the breakfasts, baths etc…  The fact is I was so wrapped up in self-discovery that I forget that someone else was managing the mundane parts of family life.  So I guess the focus of this blog is realizing the gas pedal does not always have to be to the floor and that’s OK.  There are ups and down, U turns and pitfalls.  As I write this I am actually just realizing this.  I mean I knew this already, but I never accepted it as normal part of the journey. I saw it as being unfocused, off or slipping.  The fact is its normal, we need breaks and we need change.  Kind of ironic, change causes change which causes more change.  So do I get up at 4:00 am now? Possibly, but what about simply not judging yourself or not seeing it as a failure to execute.  Life is busy, messy and disorganized at times.  It’s not a “me” problem, it’s simply reality.  So what about granting ourselves a little grace to be off from time to time.  See it as a signal that you need to reflect and re-tune.  Healthy life choices such as exercise, meditation, date nights etc… don’t need to suffer, but they may need to be revisited.  This is really an attempt at being flexible and adapting.  You don’t need to compromise your “must do’s” and life priorities.  We just need to readjust the mechanics of how it’s going to happen.

This year is as much about self-acceptance as it is life flexibility.  Is it possible to be passionate about achieving your life goals and laid back at the same time?  I hope so, because that’s my plan this year.  Crush it (great term stolen from Gary V, a rather intense guy!) at work, at home and in the gym all the while maintaining a “don’t sweat the small stuff” attitude.  If I’ve learned anything over the past year, it is life will tell us when it’s time to drive fast and when it’s time to slow down and enjoy the ride.  I’ve been amazing at times in both these areas, but I’ve always struggled with the transition.  I’ve failed to understanding that it’s not about short term balance it’s about life long management.  Although I loved writing my previous Blogs, they were changes and experiences I’d already lived through.  In many ways this Blog is a real time change for me.  A shift from being ridged to allowing things to unfold a little more naturally.

Peace Out!



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