Skip to content

BHB6: Priorities & Passions

BHB6: Priorities & Passions

It really has been a long time since I formally sat down to write a blog.  I wise coach and fellow blogger once told me there will come a day that you just won’t have anything inspiring to blog about for a period of time. Not that life is any easier or less complex; I simply didn’t feel like it.  But I’ve also come to realize that this BLOG is my way journaling.  Let’s get at it,  2020 has been and continues to be a bizarre experience.  From lockdown, to closing and reopening my business, home schooling, CERB etc… This will certainly be a year to remember.  It has also been a time to reflect on my life and to ask some important questions about how I want to proceed in 2021.

For many of you entrepreneurs, you’ll get it.  Profit margins, cash flow, projections, marketing, you name it.  These are my daily thoughts, and for as many challenges that run through my head, I find myself stuck for answers on how to solve them.  I’m not going sugar coat life as a self-employed business owner. It’s up and down, back and forth.  Some months it’s amazing and some months it plain sucks.  So what is the purpose of this little “Lawlor” rant?  It’s time to identify my Priorities & Passions.

When I named my business (Balance Health Physio) I didn’t really understand the true meaning of the word Balance; seemed like a “Physio” kind if term.  But this year I really began to understand the meaning in terms of my life and my business.  When I ask someone to balance on one foot, their typical response is, “I’m all over the place”.  Exactly, that’s the body’s way of course correcting.  We sway back and forth, and when we stray too far, we fall over.  Thus is life. Thus is business.  Thus is health & wellness.

So this blog entry is a bit of a manifesto, a course correction to a way of life and business that falls more in line with my life priorities & passions.  As a health care practitioner/Physiotherapist I truly believe that the majority of issues I see can be chalked up to one BIG problem.  We don’t move anymore.  We’re tight and weak. A good soft tissue treatment helps in a pinch; but hate to break it to you, until address the root cause, it’s not going away.  I don’t mean to sound like I have all the answers (trust me I don’t) but it’s time we stop “tip toeing” around the bigger issues.  No one can do it for you.  You must make the decision to take the necessary steps needed to live “your” life. Or in the Physio world; Do Your Exercises!

In terms of my professional world, chronic health issues are an epidemic in itself.    To keep it simple, Physio’s have a Masters Level Education in movement & exercise.  So it’s time to start treating and educating clients on how to move well and move often.  I have a passion for wellness; physical, emotional and mental. I’ve been on both sides of this life scale.  Unhappy, over weight & out of shape, as well as passionate, healthy & fit.  I’m proud to say I lean more towards the latter these days, but it’s a constant “Balancing” act.  I needed a little help to find my new course, but once I found it, I was able to make the needed adjustments on my own.  You can too.

I want to empower people to be functionally “strong” and “healthy”. I use quotations because those terms mean something different for everyone.  It may mean lean and ripped, outdoorsy and calm, flexible and comfortable etc…  Like most of us, we simply need someone to help shed some light on the right path.  We just get so stuck in our old ways that we don’t know which way is up anymore.  Please don’t be intimidated by the word exercise.  Exercise is movement and movement is exercise.  My idea of “working out” is and should be different then yours.

So take some time and dream about what your ideal healthy self looks and feels like.  Once you see it, you can begin move towards it.  Is it that easy?  Tony Robbins would say yes. He would argue that over complicating decisions is the reason we fail to make change in the first place.  Trust me, I have over complicated writing this blog and launching a new business idea because I didn’t have all the details ironed out. Will it work? Is it a good idea? Will it be a success?  Screw it, just do it (hoping not to get a letter over that trademarked slogan!) and let the rest unfold as it will.  Action creates movement, small and large.  If you are “out of shape”, just breathe and walk today.  Trust that being present in the process is the goal.  Stop focusing on some arbitrary outcome and enjoy the ride.

Move More, Move Often,

Steve

BHB5: Lighten Up, It’s 2020 – Accepting Life & Myself

BHB5: Lighten Up, It’s 2020 – Accepting Life & Myself

So it’s been a few weeks since my last blog.  I’ve unintentionally been on a bit of a social media / mental break, and down deep, I really felt like I needed some much needed down time.  Last year was an intense year of change and even though it was amazing, it does come at a cost.  The start of the New Year has been about managing new routines and exploring new opportunities.  Let’s face it, routines are fantastic but what happens when forces outside your control affect them?  Honestly, this is an actual question.  Why, this is my truth at this moment in time.  This blog is more of journal entry then a blog.  If you’ve read my previous blogs you are fully aware that for many months, 5:00-6:00 am was quiet, dark and more importantly, my time.

Adopting healthy routines is amazing, but what happens when others want to do the same?  Over the past couple months Ang has been getting up at the same time to head out to cross training and spin classes.  This is a great thing, and I 100% support her, but it’s also a change.  Change is great, but unfortunately I’m not necessarily the quickest to adapt.  My 5 year old had also decided that sleeping in past 5:30 am is not going to happen. He’s been getting up shortly after 5:00am most days, as a result, on my early morning workout days, I have found myself not getting out the door and trying to fit in a work out later in the day.  A goal that doesn’t necessarily work out all the time; no pun intended.

So this blog is more of a “work through things” rant.  The fact is, these are first world problems and shouldn’t be an issue right?  These are the real life compromises of working parents.  We both have demanding careers, run a business, coach basketball and I have also decided to go back to my roots, and am teaching two courses at a local college this semester.  Once again these are all great opportunities, but they do take time and energy away from other areas of my life.  Where my problem lies is simply I always feel like I am “failing” in the areas that aren’t getting the attention they once did.  I would guess to say that I’m not the only one who feels like they should be able to do it all.

When I was dialed in to my previous morning routine, I got up at 5:00am, journaled, listened to a podcast, worked out, got the kids lunches packed etc….  I felt like I was crushing it.  That was great for me and that particular time in our lives, but what was happening at home?  My kids were still getting up early, and Ang was left managing the breakfasts, baths etc…  The fact is I was so wrapped up in self-discovery that I forget that someone else was managing the mundane parts of family life.  So I guess the focus of this blog is realizing the gas pedal does not always have to be to the floor and that’s OK.  There are ups and down, U turns and pitfalls.  As I write this I am actually just realizing this.  I mean I knew this already, but I never accepted it as normal part of the journey. I saw it as being unfocused, off or slipping.  The fact is its normal, we need breaks and we need change.  Kind of ironic, change causes change which causes more change.  So do I get up at 4:00 am now? Possibly, but what about simply not judging yourself or not seeing it as a failure to execute.  Life is busy, messy and disorganized at times.  It’s not a “me” problem, it’s simply reality.  So what about granting ourselves a little grace to be off from time to time.  See it as a signal that you need to reflect and re-tune.  Healthy life choices such as exercise, meditation, date nights etc… don’t need to suffer, but they may need to be revisited.  This is really an attempt at being flexible and adapting.  You don’t need to compromise your “must do’s” and life priorities.  We just need to readjust the mechanics of how it’s going to happen.

This year is as much about self-acceptance as it is life flexibility.  Is it possible to be passionate about achieving your life goals and laid back at the same time?  I hope so, because that’s my plan this year.  Crush it (great term stolen from Gary V, a rather intense guy!) at work, at home and in the gym all the while maintaining a “don’t sweat the small stuff” attitude.  If I’ve learned anything over the past year, it is life will tell us when it’s time to drive fast and when it’s time to slow down and enjoy the ride.  I’ve been amazing at times in both these areas, but I’ve always struggled with the transition.  I’ve failed to understanding that it’s not about short term balance it’s about life long management.  Although I loved writing my previous Blogs, they were changes and experiences I’d already lived through.  In many ways this Blog is a real time change for me.  A shift from being ridged to allowing things to unfold a little more naturally.

Peace Out!

Steve

 

BHB4: 5:00 am – You Have to be Kidding

BHB4: 5:00 am – You Have to be Kidding

This is a routine I explored and supremely failed at roughly 15 plus years ago.  I can remember running on a cold dark morning when Ang and I were living in Toronto and saying to myself, “This F&%KING sucks, I’m just not a morning exerciser”.  So I stopped after 3 days.  Considering the experts say it takes anywhere from 30-66 days to create a lasting change, I may have missed the mark on that one.

So what do people mean by “own your morning, own your day”? In this whole complex journey of personal development, the biggest change I made was the simplest. I started getting up at 5:00am. Now I know that may sound totally out of character for some of you, but that’s the point, get uncomfortable.  If you have young kids, this may make even more sense.  Our house is literally a zoo in morning. 3 boys, a labradoodle, 2 cats, lunches, baths etc…. you get the idea.  A 5:00am wake up allows me some personal time before the chaos of the day begins.  Secondly it allows me time to practice two fundamental habits IMO; Reflection & Movement (and lots of coffee!).

Reflection can come in many different forms, meditation, journaling, gratitude.  The fact is, taking some time to reflect on what’s going on in your life, and what you are grateful for, can dramatically change your outlook for the day.  At the advice of my coach, I started journaling. Reluctantly by the way.  She asked me 3 times before I really committed to making it a regular habit.  Honestly, it was more of a pain in the ass at the start.  I’d rather sit, have my coffee and relax for a bit. But I sucked it up and started keeping a journal.  I free write about whatever is in my head for a few minutes, jot down 5 things I’m grateful for and identify three goals for the day.  It really does help reframe your day.  In my case, I get a chance to rant to myself and then refocus by reminding myself of how much I have to be grateful for.  Do I get this done every day, NO.  I used to beat myself up about that but now I’m completely OK with 3-4 times a week.  The other days I still get up early, but I just sit and enjoy the peace and quiet.  My mind is in full production mode most moments of the day, so I find I need a break from time to time.

Back to a familiar statement, faith and trust come into play once again; success leaves clues.  Too many high level performers (business leaders, athletes, entrepreneurs) keep journals for it to be just “fluff”.  Don’t believe me, search away, you’ll see it.  What’s in their journals?  Thoughts, goals, affirmations, gratitude lists, vision/dream boards, you name it.  It’s simply a place to organize thoughts or just rant.  The power of writing things down has been discussed for decades.

Ok time for the “big change” for some, movement!  Well, I use this term because as soon as you say exercise, many people run and hide (no pun intended).  I hate to break it to you but physical activity is a key.  For me, it is an absolute.  Being fit or buff is not the goal, there are numerous, positive chemical changes to your body that occur with physical activity.  Increase in endorphins (good chemical), decreases in cortisol (stress hormone) and so many more that it’s hard to keep track of.  The simplest way to look at morning exercise is it works like the primer on a snow blower.  It gets the right fuel pumping through your body, and as a result, it starts and runs more efficiently.

I know, that’s all great info and not overly new.  So why is it a must for me?  I have ups and downs, plain and simple.  It’s something I started to notice when I was in university.  I was fortunate enough to play university basketball and as result, exercise was always organized and scheduled for me; practice, games, training sessions etc… But when I came home after the season, I started to notice I would have “lows”.  At that point in my life I would have been less aware of it and probably partying and drinking too much as well.  That could last 3-4 weeks and then I would begin hitting the gym to get ready for the next season.  I would start running and lifting weights and soon enough, I would start to feel more “myself”.  Sound like some rather familiar routines I currently practice? If you’ve seen any of my posts on social media, that may help make a little more sense of the health and fitness focus.  It keeps me balanced, and my moods and emotions become much more consistent.  Now a days it’s a much easier topic to discuss, but 20 years ago it was not something you chat about with your friends over a beer.  Hey guys lets chat about my emotions and what my Psychologist and I discussed at our last session.  Not exactly the topic that you bring up at a pub.  I’m lucky though, I don’t suffer from anything in a clinical sense and the bit of anxiety I do have is managed easily by taking care of myself.  These Blogs are another form of self-care.  They are as much a personal reminder for me as anything else.  Writing about these topics helps me remember “why” I made changes.  I can tell you flat out that I haven’t been as diligent with my routine the last few weeks and I feel it.  I’ve noticed my stress levels increasing and I don’t feel as tolerant and energetic.

Ok that may be a long winded way of explaining why my morning routine is so important.  It’s taken almost 20 plus years to fully understand, but hey better late than never.  Healthy routines have honestly had the biggest impact on my life over the past year and half.  I can’t necessarily fully explain why, but I know with 100% certainty that I can operate at a higher level when I do and my family gets the best version of me.  The great thing about this is, it’s about developing routines that work for you.  Don’t try and make multiple changes at once, just make one small change at a time and see where it takes you.

See you in the AM,

Steve

BHB3: Change is Just a Click Away

BHB3: Change is Just a Click Away

So this is the third attempt at the BHB3.  The first one was complete case of writer’s block, so that one found its way to the windows recycling bin.  That same morning while I was out for a run I decided I would cut the crap and be real. So I came home, grabbed my computer and the words started flowing.  Then technical issues ensued; which ended in losing the second draft.  Sound like the start of some of your days?  Sometimes the world is determined to either make you take a deep breath or tear your hair out.  Which will it be?   For me there is no choice, I don’t really have any more hair to loose.  But honestly, that sad attempt at humor may have more truth to it then you realize. My younger self would have chosen the latter.  I would have let a tough start to a day, a poor result on a test and especially a poor performance on the court ruin the rest of my day or more.

So this less than ideal start to the day seemed like a great segway into the topic of mind-set and managing emotions.  Robin Sharma put it best in his book The 5am Club (love this book BTW), change is hard at first, messy in the middle and beautiful in the end.  Obviously you can take a guess what phase of the process I’m in! It’s meant to be messy and hard.  Recognizing you need to make a change is easy, deciding to actually follow through is bloody hard.  As I was trying to explain in version 2 of this blog, I woke up this morning, felt like crap, wanted to stay in bed, got lunches ready and pestered (nicer description then yelling) my children to quit goofing around and get ready for school.  Super parenting Steve!

But this is where the right content can help shift your mindset.  After all the morning chaos I decided to go for a run. That’s when I noticed an email notification from The Rich Roll Podcast (staple on my Podcast list).  He was interviewing Mark Manson, the author of the The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F#@K.  I’ve actually seen this book numerous times and never given it a second thought.  But today, the Podcast title (Stop Compromising Yourself – Hope, Human Dignity & The Perils of Comfort) seemed to catch my attention.  It’s a great interview and Manson explains it perfectly, personal development should be hard and uncomfortable.  In the first version of this blog, I was simply trying to explain that finding content that resonates with you, is one of the first steps in starting this journey of personal discovery.  I totally agree with that statement, but looking back, I’m glad I didn’t post that version.  In all honesty, it was fluff and bull shit.  I was painting a picture of sunshine and roses.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my life, the changes I’ve made and the path I’ve chosen, but that doesn’t mean I never have bad days or negative thoughts; quite the contrary.  But the work I have done with my coach, the books I have read and the Podcasts I listen to, have helped me open my mind enough to recognize these non-productive thought patterns, and I now implement strategies to get my mind back on track.

You see it’s like formal meditation.  About a year ago I made an attempt at daily meditation, but after 4 or 5 days I gave it up because I simply sucked at it. My mind was constantly going off in all directions.  “Focus on the breath”. I could do that for maybe 5 sec before I would begin wondering once again.  What I came to learn was the point is not to stay on track the entire time, the skill is recognizing you are not focusing on the moment and pulling yourself back.  It’s just like your mood day to day; it is completely unrealistic to expect yourself to be on all the time. Real growth is in your ability to simply accept you are off and take some form of action to change your state.  Simple right?  Well it is simple to write about, but actually changing your state is a bit more challenging.

Sometimes, for no good reason at all, I’ll find myself in a shitty mood, and in a weird way, it’s rather familiar; like a safely blanket.  A year & a half ago that emotional state, although completely destructive and unproductive, was home base for me.  Yes this is one of those “unopened” chapters in my life that I talked about in BHB1. For the most part I was always on at work and in social situations.  But when it came to home, well I’m not proud to say that my family got the shit end of that stick.  Moody, stressed, anxiety ridden Steve, was a regular fixture at our home.   No one can keep up two separate personalities, it will catch up to you at some point.

What changed?  Significant emotional PAIN……. (that topic could be a full Blog by itself).  The pain of not being the husband and father I knew I could be, the pain of not liking my physical & emotional self, the pain of thinking about what would happen to my family if I didn’t do something.  It was honestly a bit of a rock bottom for me.  So in typical “all in” Steve fashion I started to seek out enormous amounts of information.  Podcasts, audio books, blogs, you name it.  I listened to material on improving my marriage, my physical fitness, my daily routines, diet, parenting and high performance.  I’ve listened to similar content in the past but this time was different, I was actively listening and actually implementing many of the things I was learning.

But don’t get me wrong it was boarder line exhausting and the ultimate test of my personal and family’s patients.  Some of the recommendations felt odd and forced, some came across insincere and just simply did not work for me, my marriage or my family.  But I also found some amazing content. The collection of information and ideas allowed me to create a bit of a personal roadmap for me and our life.   You see whatever path you choose, it needs to work for you and your family.  My plan forced me to seriously revisit our family goals and make life decisions that aligned with them.  It also forced some hard, uncomfortable conversations between Ang and I that resulted in some massive changes for our family.  For those of you who know us well, you have seen us make some major changes in the past year and a half.  They didn’t come of thin air, they are part of our plan and a direct result of those hard discussions. We have always said that the most important people to please in this world, besides ourselves, is our spouse and then our kids.  Without us there is no family, so we implemented changes which built on that focus. Everything else was just noise.

A lot of times when you feel like something isn’t going “right”, it’s hard to identify exactly what it is, how to change it and where to start.  Because of those conversations we knew that some things in our lives were not where they should be, so the starting point for me was change myself and my role as a husband.  A 14 min Youtube audio clip from Tony Robbins changed the way I viewed marriage and myself.  The changes I made in that area began to naturally affect other areas in my life as well and a year and half later you’re reading this.  I guess what I’m trying to get at is, if you want to change something in your life, everything you need to change is at your fingertips, a simple click on the Podcast icon on your smart phone could change your life.  But you need a “why” strong enough to take massive action.

Are you struggling with your diet, try Sean Stevenson’s Podcast, The Model Health Show.  Is your marriage or relationship not where you want it to be, Rachelle & Dave Hollis have a fabulous Podcast called RISE.  Looking for motivation or self-improvement? Try The Steve Weatherford Show, Max Out with Ed Mylette or the Marie Forleo Show. You see there is someone out there that will resonate with you.  I promise that if those personalities don’t work for you, you’ll find someone through their interviews that will.   Remember this is a starting point.  In some cases you’ll find the answers you’re looking for and in others you may realize you need more info or maybe you need to seek out professional help. The goal is to be open minded, get out of your head and actively listen to different opinions.  So don’t wait, search through some shows, download a few episodes and listen to them during your morning commute, walk etc… Tony Robbins always cuts through the fluff with his quotes, you’re either growing or dying.

Choose Growing,

Steve

 

BHB2: My Relationship with Alcohol – Why I gave up booze for 95 Days

 

 

BHB2: My Relationship with Alcohol – Why I gave up booze for 95 Days

Ok, so this awkward conversation we’re about to have.  Why?  Because other than for religious, cultural or ethical reasons, society’s view of someone not drinking is, you’re an alcoholic.  I’ve toyed around with idea before, but when it came down to the actual not drinking part, I couldn’t do it.  This is where our conversation begins.  On week 2 of my life coaching sessions I brought up the idea of not drinking for 30 days. Why?  So many “high performers” don’t drink; there has to be something to it, right?  The response from my coach, “it’s time to discuss your relationship with alcohol”.

Yes, I said relationship.  Dig deep, because you know you have one too (good, bad or otherwise). For me, alcohol had been by my side for all of life’s major events; graduation, university life, friends, vacation, weddings, funerals, you name it.  Sound like an odd way to look at booze?

After reflecting on “our” relationship, I found myself feeling rather uncomfortable.  Do I have a drinking problem?  Do I rely on it?  Will I miss it? Sounds like the questions you asked yourself when you’re breaking up with someone. Well, a relationship is a relationship, and in my case, I needed to re-establish some boundaries.  It all started with being asked to write a letter about my relationship with alcohol.  I’ll spare you the details, but it quickly turned into a rant about needing a break and how I wasn’t sure where it would go from here.  Very strange to write, and equally as odd to read.

What came out of that activity, was a feeling that “we” had a great time, and I would never change that, but that I’ve come to a new phase in my life, and there was limited space for you.  I am committed to having energy now.  Energy to work out 6 days a week, energy to be a great husband and father, energy to execute new business ideas etc…  That’s what it was about for me.  Let’s face it, four 8% IPA’s on a Friday night does not translate to an energetic Saturday morning.  My kids don’t give a shit if I’m sluggish.  They expect the best version of Dad every day.

Giving it up was also about trust.  Can I trust myself enough to do it?  That was a powerful question for me.  What I learned was most people who enjoy a drink or two fall on a continuum, sliding back and forth between, drinking a bit too much, and drinking a little bit.  Or at least that’s the explanation that resonated with me after listening to The Rich Roll Podcast with guest Andy Ramage – One Year No Beer & Beyond.  For me, well that summed up my partnership with it.  I have absolutely had times where I would say I was drinking too much and other times that it wasn’t an issue.

Making the decision to give up alcohol was actually the easy part, explaining to everyone why was the hard part.  Just refer back to the first two lines of this blog.   I told the majority of people I was doing a “cleans”. I was working out a lot and generally trying to improve my overall health, so it was an easy “sell”.  But I was still anxious about how it would be viewed. In the end I was committed to 30 days!

30 days in, mid-summer, on vacation and I had stuck to my promise.  Guess what, I can trust myself. So what do I do now?  Well life has a funny way of happening when you need answers.  Just prior to my 30 Days, I ran across a few more resources that promoted the benefits of extending a “cleans” to 90 Days. So a 30 day promise turned into a 90 day challenge.  90 days to begin to write another story.  You see, I loved microbreweries, beer glasses, a cold drink on hot summer day, and trying new craft beers with good friends.  I loved going to sporting events and having a beer, a bite and a beer at cool pubs and boys weekend.  I was so scared that I would have to give up all of these “good times”, because that was the story I created around them.  I felt like I would need to cut people and events out of my life in order to keep my promise.  A few years ago I went as far as not wanting to go on a Caribbean vacation with my wife because I was in a good health & fitness routine, and didn’t want to be tempted to over indulge.

90 Days allowed me to re-frame the relationship, change my story and most of all, learn to trust my word to myself.  Ed Mylett said it best – Confidence is simply a result of keeping the promises you make to yourself.  When we make plans to see friends, go out for dinner, or go away on vacation, I don’t sweat it anymore.  Why?  Because drinking too much is in conflict with my life’s mission statement.  Yes, I have started to develop a mission statement for Steve.  A set of values and beliefs that everything I do will be filtered through. If something isn’t consistent with that statement, then it doesn’t get any airtime.

So how different did I feel after 90 Days?  I certainly had more energy, didn’t miss workouts and generally felt healthier.  But let’s face it, Ang and I have 3 young boys and parenting is possibly the most tiring job out there.  So I still had times of pure parental exhaustion.  That being said I can honestly say that there were more times where I had the energy to have an extra catch, shoot some hoops or just head out for a hike.  So yes, not drinking helped in that department. It also cut down my level of anxiety and stress.  Alcohol is like throwing gasoline on a fire for stress and anxiety; not exactly the calming affect many are looking for. That one might hit home for a few people, me included.

There were also some other valuable lessons.  The first was simply, I did drink too much.  I would never say I had a problem, but I was too casual with alcohol IMO.  This is not meant to be a comparison to your drinking habits, but it I do hope to spark some meaningful discussions about society’s views of drinking.  Many people simply said “good for you”, and we continued on chatting about what we would normally discuss at a dinner party.   In a few instances, it sparked some great conversations about Life Coaching and what I was trying to accomplish. The fact is, it didn’t change the funny stories, the conversations, or the friends I enjoy spending time with.  I just wasn’t drinking, that’s all that was different.  Some people clearly felt uncomfortable or just didn’t get it and that’s OK too.  This is my ride not their’s.

Day 95 Ang and I had one glass of a really nice red wine. But it was different.  95 Days allowed me to create a new story and re-establish a healthy relationship with alcohol.  I enjoy a nice red wine and hoppy IPA’s are still my favorite craft beer, but no longer will they have a seat at the decision making table.  God knows many of us have made some rather dumb ones under the influence.

So maybe you’re just sober-curious or perhaps you do have a problem.  Regardless there are huge benefits to self-discovery and in my case, alcohol was getting in my way.  I know I’ll enjoy a drink from time to time, but if I don’t, it’s no big deal.

Bottoms Up or Down,

Steve

BHB1: Personal Development & Life Coaching – IMO

This is a pretty exciting venture for me and the idea of just opening up about topics near and dear to me is a little scary.  To most people who really know me I’m somewhat of an open book. That being said I do have a few chapters I “keep to myself”. A few days ago I opened up about one of those chapters through a social media post and briefly spoke about working with a life coach.  The experience has helped change my perspective of me. Yes me, not life in general or my opinions of others, it starts with me.

This is where the Balance Health Blog (BHB1) will begin.  Maximizing yourself or self-improvement starts with turning your attention away from how everything else affects you and retrains you to understand the relationship you have with the person in the mirror.  For me, man, I treated myself like shit. Overly critical, self-sabotaging, negative, insecure. These are just a few of the traits that dominated my internal dialogue. Sound familiar anyone? I know for a fact I am not the only one, but guess what guys, yes I mean men, we do a lousy job of talking about this subject.  Just take a look at social media, women dominate the area because they are actively seeking wisdom.

Sorry, I rant as well (whoops I’m not supposed to apologise for being me – Sorry #coachkorba).  Shit I said sorry again. Rachel Hollis certainly ran on this topic and wrote a New York Times best seller – Girl Stop Apologising (highly recommended).  But really, don’t apologise for being unique, for thinking differently than the “in crowd”, for having dreams. Self-love is the primary foundation of self-help IMO.  This is where a Life Coach can really help. In a very simplistic way, my coach helped me see how bad I was treating myself, how that was affecting my relationships, my business and my progress. Obviously there is more to it in my case, but a more “masculine” term that most would understand is “confidence”.  Being confident in who you are and the life you want to live. Not arrogant or cocky, the fact is, the majority of those people are the most insecure folks out there.

So where am I going with this.  Maybe you are a self-help or personal development junkie like me and have listened to everything out there (Tony Robbins, everything by Oprah, The Secret, Rachel Hollis, Jim Rohn, Jack Canfield, Les Brown etc…).  Maybe you just feel like you have so much more to offer but you just feel overwhelmed or stuck. A Coach can be seen as a mentor that helps you identify your strengths and provide you with guidance in the areas you feel need improvement.  Simply put, it’s like that basketball coach who saw something more in you and helped you see it for yourself.

Success leaves clues.  The most successful people in business, entertainment and athletics, utilize mentors and “Life Coach’s” to find their edge.  Andre Agassi, one of the greatest tennis players in history, was struggling late in his career and most experts felt he was simply past his prime.  But for those old enough to remember (I am that old), he had a massive resurgence. What changed? He met Tony Robbins. Robbins didn’t teach him to hit a better forehand,  he challenged his current way of thinking, taught him how to maximize his mind set and re-framed his belief in himself. Knowledge of himself was his new power.

It may not be your cup of tea, but for me, working with Doreen Korba (#coachkorba) was the most enlightening 12 weeks of my life.  So if you want more out of your life, consider starting the process. Just be prepared, you may never go back to your old ways. So stay tuned.  The mission of this blog is to start sharing some of the material that has helped me, and to create a community where people can share ideas. It’s all about helping just one person.

Look in a mirror and smile,

Steve

—————————————-

Steve Lawlor MSc (PT), Cert. MDT
Owner / Physiotherapist
Balance Health Physio